‘How to Handle Pain’

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21st Jan, 2022

There’s a scene in this wonderful movie, Lawrence of Arabia where Lawrence, played by Peter O’Toole, calmly extinguishes a match between his thumb and his forefinger. A fellow officer tries it himself and squeals in pain.

“Oh! It damn well hurts,” he says.

“Certainly it hurts,” Lawrence replies.

“Well, what’s the trick, then?”

“The trick,” Lawrence says, “is not minding that it hurts”.

Lawrence’s response is stoic.

Sure, he felt the pain, yet it remained a sensation, a reflex. It never metastasized into panic. Lawrence didn’t mind the pain, in the literal sense of the word: He didn’t allow his mind to dwell on and amplify, what his body had felt.

That is how you should handle pain and failure. Don’t let your mind dwell on it for too long and amplify it, never confuse the loss of a battle with the loss of war. Many more battles are to be fought, many more battles to be won and many more to shine.

As Robert Adams explained, “I cannot tell you enough that every situation that happens to you is necessary for your growth. There are no mistakes. Everything that you’ve been through, everything that you’re going through, is absolutely necessary for your spiritual growth. If it does not look kosher to you, realize it’s your mind reacting. It’s your ego reacting. And the way to handle it is to just observe and not let it affect you

Just remember that a Bad day or a bad decision or a bad outcome is not equal to a bad life. In retrospect when you will Connect the Dots, it will all look like one grand plan for the better.

Don’t dwell on the pain for too long, move on and stay blessed forever.

(From my Book, ‘Dear Son…Life Lessons from a Father)