‘Prepare your children for the road’

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14th Nov, 2023

An avid Gardner, saw a small butterfly laying a few eggs in one of the pots in his garden.

Since that day he looked at the egg with ever growing curiosity and eagerness.

The egg started to move and shake a little & the gardener was excited to see a new life coming up right in front of his eyes & spent hours watching the egg which started to expand & develop cracks.

A tiny head & antennae started to come out ever so slowly & the man’s excitement knew no bounds. He got his magnifying glasses & sat to watch the life & body of a pupa coming out.

He saw the struggle of the tender pupa & couldn’t resist his urge to help.

He went & got tender forceps to help the egg break, a nip here, a nip there to help the struggling life.

And lol,

The pupa was out & the man was ecstatic!

He waited now each day for the pupa to grow & transform to a beautiful butterfly,

but Alas that never happened.

The larvae pupa had an oversized head & kept crawling along in the pot for a few weeks & died!

Depressed the man went to his botanist friend & asked the reason.

His friend told him, the struggle to break out of the egg helps the larvae to send blood to its wings, and the head push helps the head to remain small so that the tender wings can support it through its 4-week life cycle.

In his eagerness to help, the man destroyed a beautiful life!

Struggles help all of us, that’s why a wee bit of effort goes a long way to develop our strength to face life’s difficulties!

As parents, we sometimes go too far trying to help & protect our kids from life’s harsh realities & disappointments.

We don’t want our kids to struggle like we did.

But Harvard psychiatrist Dr. Dan Kindlon says that over-protected children are more likely to struggle in relationships & with challenges. We’re sending our kids the message that they’re not capable of helping themselves.

My favorite parenting motto has always been, “Prepare the child for the road, not the road for the child.”

Yet even so, it’s hard not to be a ‘Snowplow Parent’ – It’s hard not to clear every obstacle in our children’s path so they can be happy now – getting what they want, when they want it.

But when we clear the road for a child, we make their life too easy.

We don’t allow them to build life-coping skills they’ll need down the road to handle life’s hard realities.

The way to do it is like the farmer who asked his child to work every day at the farm.

His Friend said to him,

“You do not have to make your son work so hard. The crop would grow just as


The farmer replied, “I’m not cultivating my crops, but my child.”

The father who does not teach his children their duties is as guilty as the children who neglect them.

It’s hard to admit this, but part of a parent’s job is to help our kids not need us.

Most of all, I hope I can love my kids enough to not make their life too easy. It’s a tall order for any parent whose heart breaks whenever their child is unhappy, but one we must all work toward if we want our kids to reach their full potential as healthy and well-adjusted adults.

Let’s not overprotect our children,

Today, as we celebrate Children’s Day, Let’s prepare our children for the road & stay Blessed forever!