‘What lie are you telling yourself?’

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1st May 2024

What lie have you repeated to yourself so many times that it feels like the truth?

“Watch your thoughts, they become your words;

Watch your words, they become your actions;

Watch your actions, they become your habits;

Watch your habits, they become your character; Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.” ~ Lao Tzu

There is a concept in cognitive science called the Illusory Truth Effect: It’s the tendency to believe false information after consistent, repeated exposures. In other words, if you are told a lie over and over again, it takes in your mind as a truth.

It’s particularly damning when that lie is a lie you tell yourself.

You have an internal dialogue that runs 24/7.

The quality of that internal dialogue has a real, tangible impact on your interaction with the external world:

If you tell yourself over and over again that you aren’t capable of something, you will believe it to be true & You won’t try.

If you tell yourself over and over again that you aren’t worthy of something, you will believe it to be true & You won’t reach for it.

If you tell yourself over and over again that you are a static entity, you will believe it to be true & You won’t attempt to grow.

If you tell yourself over & over again that you don’t have enough money, you will believe it to be true & never invest to create a corpus and create wealth.

The most frequent lie we tell ourselves is, ” If I could just get X, my life would just turn around & be amazing.

Take your pick of what X is: get married, get more time, get a raise, get a new car, a new house, a new pet, holiday every weekend, whatever.

Obviously, you’re smart enough that I don’t have to tell you, that no one single goal will ever solve your happiness problems permanently.

After all, that’s the tricky part about the brain: the “If only I had X, then…” mechanism never goes away.

We lie to ourselves for different reasons: to maintain comfort, to not disturb our self-image, to protect ourselves; and ultimately, to avoid suffering.

When we deny our truth by lying to ourselves, we miss opportunities for growth and learning, and we all owe it to ourselves to be true and live our authentic lives.

Observe your internal dialogue: What lie have you been repeating to yourself?

Recognize it, fight back, stop lying to yourself & stay blessed forever.