24th January, 2023
The greatest discovery of my generation is, that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitude.
~William James
Whenever we’re dealing with bad news, a difficult person, or a disappointment of some kind, most of us get into certain habits, ways of reacting to life – particularly adversity – that don’t serve us very well.
We overreact, blow things out of proportion, hold on too tightly, and focus on the negative aspects of life. When we are immobilized by little things – when we are irritated, annoyed, and easily bothered – our (over) reactions not only make us frustrated but actually get in the way of getting what we want.
We lose sight of the bigger picture, focus on the negative, and annoy other people who might otherwise help us.
In short, we live our lives as if they were one great big emergency!
We often rush around looking busy, trying to solve problems, but in reality, we are often compounding them.
Because everything seems like such a big deal, we end up spending our lives dealing with one drama after another.
After a while, we begin to believe that everything really is a big deal. We fail to recognize that the way we relate to our problems has a lot to do with how quickly and efficiently we solve them.
Often we allow ourselves to get all worked up about things that, upon closer examination, aren’t really that big a deal. We focus on little problems and concerns and blow them way out of proportion.
A stranger, for example, might cut in front of us in traffic. Rather than let it go, and go on with our day, we convince ourselves that we are justified in our anger. We play out an imaginary confrontation in our mind. Many of us might even tell someone else about the incident later on rather than simply let it go. Why not instead simply allow the driver to have his accident somewhere else?
Try to have compassion for the person and remember how painful it is to be in such an enormous hurry. This way, we can maintain our own sense of well-being and avoid taking other people’s problems personally. There are many similar, “small stuff” examples that occur every day in our lives.
Whether we had to wait in line, listen to unfair criticism, or do the lion’s share of the work, it pays enormous dividends if we learn not to worry about little things.
So many people spend so much of their life energy “sweating the small stuff” that they completely lose touch with the magic and beauty of life. When you commit to working toward this goal you will find that you will have far more energy to be kinder and gentler.
When you learn the habit of responding to life with more ease, problems that seemed “insurmountable” will begin to seem more manageable.
And even the “biggies,” things that are truly stressful, won’t throw you off track as much as they once did.
Happily, there is another way to relate to life – a softer, more graceful path that makes life seem easier and the people in it more compatible.
This “other way” of living involves replacing old habits of “reaction” with new habits of perspective. These new habits enable us to have richer, more satisfying lives.
Richard Carlson in his wonderful must read book, ‘Dont sweat the small stuff, and it’s all small stuff’ states that there are 2 rules for living in harmony,
1) Don’t sweat the small stuff and
2) It’s all small stuff.
Incredibly simple & true for living a wonderful life.
Adopt this simple rules & stay blessed forever.